Much Better Day

Day 3 of recovery has been the best so far! Thanks everyone for your nice comments and prayers, it really means a lot.

First two days were rough - it hurt quite a bit to get in and out of the bed and on and off the couch. I slept restlessly and couldn't get comfortable. The only position that didn't hurt was flat on my back, and that quickly got old.

But today has been so much better! I am slowly weaning myself off the Percocet and onto Ibuprofen instead. I can get up and down so much easier, and walking around has gotten better as well. The only thing that is still troubling is using the restroom - but the nurses told me this would be the last function to return to normal. Fortunately I am taking tomorrow off work as well, so hopefully I will be fully functioning for work on Tuesday. 

I am still bummed that we have to wait so long to start trying again. I was really hoping we could try again right away. I understand Doc wanting to give my body time to heal, but it was a bit of a let down nonetheless. I am going to try to stay busy during the next two months to take my mind off of it. 

• We are going to California for a week in June to celebrate our second wedding anniversary, so I am going to throw myself into planning that.
• I have a ton of great reading I can catch up on, and I can always use more time spent in prayer and God's Word.
• I have taken up knitting and quilting lately. There are a few beginner classes I want to take in May and June, and my mom is sending me one of her sewing machines for the quilting. I am really excited about it! (I know, sounds very old ladyish, but I promise it is super fun!)
• After Doc gives me the okay, I am ready to hit the gym hardcore at least 3-4 times a week.
• Spend lots of weekends at the pool and the lake!

So you can expect my blog to not say much about fertility stuff for the next two months - but I will still give other updates, so stay tuned!

It's Over

Surgery was not nearly as bad as I anticipated. I was still nervous going in, but sent up a ton of prayers to God to calm them, bless our doctors/nurses and it worked!

I was in a lot of pain afterwards. I still have discomfort when getting up/down from the couch and bed and walking. Thank goodness I am not having the carbon dioxide pain that so many experience. What I do have is annoying, but bearable. Let's hope it stays that way!

Doc found three cysts in or around my left ovary and removed them all. Both my ovaries were stuck to the pelvic wall, so he freed them. He also found endometriosis spots on the left side right behind the ovary. Other than that, everything was good. No blocks or spots in the tubes or in the uterus. The fibroid was so small (13 mm) he did not think it was worth it to remove it.

Right now Doc says it is Stage III - but he has some tests to run before knowing for sure. This is because there was so much damage around the ovaries! I am so grateful to God that he was able to remove everything while still keeping my ovary intact. He wants us to take 1-2 months off to give my body time to heal. Then he wants to start treatment right away, since I have a more advanced case. He doesn't recommend IVF for me now, so it will probably be an IUI. I'll have my post op in two weeks and will know more then!

Although I am not thrilled I have endometriosis, I am not all surprised. It feels so good to have a reason for our infertility, and I am resting in God's promises and faith in Him that this surgery will lead to our little oranges!

More later. Thank you all for your prayers!

Lappity Lap

Had my pre-op appointment with Doc yesterday. It went well - the nurse really allayed some of my fears. Don't get me wrong, I am still nervous, especially when I think about what is going to be happening to me while I am asleep! But I just need to keep in mind two things:

1. I will be asleep during all of these terrible things, and will therefore have NO CLUE they are happening while they are happening. 
2. And this is really first - God is with me!

The best news of all is that I do NOT have to do bowel prep! The nurse thought it was so funny that I had completely prepared myself for it - I am still going to have a light diet today and tomorrow that consists of easy to digest foods though, just to make it easier on myself after surgery. Doc came in after the nurse and reassured me that he is a pro at this surgery - says he does it at least every other week and he has done hundreds of them. So that certainly is helping me to feel better about recovery. He also reiterated again that he was glad I had decided to do the surgery, and that he feels it is the best choice for me at this point. Sometime in May we will have a post-op appointment to review the surgery/photos and go over next steps.

I know I don't have many readers - but if you could please send up a prayer for me on Friday morning it would be lovely! Just that everything goes well, my recovery is easy and most importantly that Doc is able to safely remove anything that could be preventing pregnancy.

I will post again after surgery!

Hangin' Out

Not much to report on in the realm of fertility world. We are just biding our time until surgery on the 29th. I am still nervous about it, but keeping a level-head through prayer, faith and low-stress. I just need to keep telling myself that this is a very routine surgery! Additionally, it will give us some answers. We already know that whatever is in there has been causing our problems, but it will be so good to know how severe the damage is and I am praying Doc will be able to clean out all the problem areas so we can conceive - whether on our own or with help!

This weekend we are starting on our garden project. We were supposed to have family come visit next weekend, but that is looking as if it will be canceled due to my Mom being sick. Have a great weekend blog world!

Surgery

As for a real update, I went in for a CD 2 ultrasound and Doc is pretty sure I have not only an endometrioma on/in my left ovary, but I also seem to have a dermoid cyst. (Grossest thing I have ever googled.) He is fairly confident I have some level of endometriosis, due to my painful periods and long bouts of spotting prior to AF. So I am scheduled for a laparoscopic surgery on April 29.

I am totally freaked out about surgery. The whole thing is making me nervous, but I am glad to be doing it. If you read this and have had this surgery or know anyone who has had it, please let me know your thoughts on it. I am particularly interested to hear recovery time. Doc says I should be back to work on Monday (surgery is Friday), but I went ahead and scheduled a day off for Monday to be on the safe side.

So this is a month off for us. I am actually taking birth control to keep my ovaries from growing large follicles that could make the surgery difficult for Doc. Depending on the stage of the endo, we may have to take time off after surgery as well. I am praying the damage is not severe, and that we can begin treatment after successful removal!

Harry Potter Infertility

I have decided to get a basilisk. Then, every time someone decides to announce their pregnancy it will go like this.

Prego: Guess what, we're pregnant! And it only took two and a half days - it was so hard waiting, but we finally got pregnant!
Orange Girl: Fantastic! Guess what, I am not pregnant, so I got a basilisk instead. (Begins speaking in parseltounge.)

Basilisk attacks Prego and eats her. Problem solved. No more pregnancy announcements, because I will just sic my big ole, big ole basilisk on people. You better watch out. That girl's got a basilisk and she ain't kidding around. 

Pregnancy Announcements

It happened again. Just when I thought I was over all work-related pregnancies another girl announced her pregnancy. She is due in November. She has a just turned one year old baby boy. She also revealed to me that another girl in our department, who had a baby last year, is also trying to conceive again, so I am sure she will soon be pregnant.

Ugh. What is wrong with me? Seriously - I was able to put on a happy face and hug her and I am sure to her everything appeared normal. And honestly, I am seriously happy for her and glad she is having a baby. I just feel so left behind. I want this too. In fact, she said to me as she was leaving, "You'll be next!" Oh, how I wish that was true. In her defense, it took her 8 months to get pregnant the first time, so she understands what it is like to a point, although she never underwent any fertility treatment.

I have not told anyone at work that we are trying. In fact, people think that I am not ready, because I have said that. Yes, I have lied. When people ask me, I just say, "Oh, not yet." And act like that is not even on the radar yet. I just don't want people knowing. Someday I may change my mind. But I am not there yet. I don't think I would have a lot of support. Maybe I am wrong, but I just don't feel it.

The one upside in all of this is that fortunately, I do not get asked when I am going to have kids very often, but I know it's coming. I will be married two years this June. I feel like that is the magic number to start getting the questions about kids. But I know I will not be able to ward them off forever. I hope and pray our time is coming, and soon.